You know what’s the worst?

When you try so hard to stop creating the same old sabotaging patterns in your life and just be happy—but then old, destructive patterns show up — again (argh!), and negative self-talk ramps up, and yet another relationship implodes, leaving you totally defeated. 

What’s a girlfriend to do? 

It doesn’t matter that you’ve read all the latest self-help books! And tried that advice your auntie gave you! And even tried to take a break from social media for a while to “find yourself”  (Though you did miss practicing the latest dance challenge video and photos of Micheal B. Jordan.) 

Alas, the dirty, low-down truth is this: black women are always going to struggle with overcoming the overwhelming odds and getting to a place of true happiness and empowerment. We think, just wait and see … one day I’ll get mine!  

But, are we sure? Will it really “just happen” one day?

Because here’s what I often see happen with my clients:

• They spend a lot of money on making their outer physical presence wonderful, but that often does nothing to make them feel better about themselves as a whole. 
• They get lost in thinking that true happiness can come mainly from another relationship, and so they make misguided relationship choice after misguided relationship choice … which only serves to make them feel worse.
• They spend way too much time trying to do what this one is doing and what that one is doing, instead of once and for all figuring out and focusing on what they really want.
  

And you know what that means? 

• Perpetually feeling like you’re in competition with the next woman (there’s a better way, I promise)
• Staying way too long in entanglements that drain your tank instead of filling it (yes, they give you temporary happiness, but is it worth the heartache in the end?)
• Constantly feeling like you, yourself, just the way you are right now is never enough (and take it from me, that just ain’t true!)
  

This is precisely why I do this work: because I know that together, we can fix all of that and more. 

I am a certified happiness coach that specializes in working with women, and black women in particular on these issues, and I know two things to be true: 

1. We don’t have control of many of the external circumstances and challenges that are unique to us.
2. We don’t have widespread access to the things that do contribute to our mental, and emotional well-being.

But what do we have? 

We have Love. Self-love to be exact. 

The HHH method (HHH stands for happiness, healing, and happily ever after … every girlfriend’s dream) is the one thing that teaches that true happiness and healing starts with YOU, nobody else. You already have everything you need within you to be a  whole, happy woman. 

Because that’s the thing, isn’t it? All you need to do is decide that you want to do the work and then find the right person to help guide you and you will find YOUR happy. 

So that’s why the HHH method was developed. At first blush, this seems like just another self-help system. But rather, the concept here is simple: you don’t have to learn a lot of complex psychological terms, you don’t have to subscribe to any theories that don’t sit well with you and you don’t have to sign up for any and every latest course or program. 

All you need is the willingness to love yourself. Forever and always. And then let that love lead the way. 

***

I’m Erica Love Davis.

Empowerment Specialist … Clarity-bringer … Thought Provoker, Happiness Ever after Co-creator.

With the HHH Method, I help put people in touch with their inherent happiness. I help them get unstuck, heal from damaging and disempowering narratives, and thrive with a new vision for their lives … all while making it feel like a soul-soothing session with your most loving friend.

When I’m not helping women (and men!) achieve Happiness ever after, you’ll probably find me on the beach meditating or doing my best yoga moves. Or anywhere taking photography of beautiful places and things.

My website, ericalovedavis.com, is all about inspiring people to create the personal change that they’ve always wanted … life-changing conversations with a healthy dash of healing and empowerment.